A Bad Review

A BAD REVIEW

...Of a bad film.  My wife and I dropped Lily off at my parent’s house earlier this week with the intention of seeing a movie - any movie.  We'd been out of the house together a total of 3 times in the last 6 weeks, so we weren't too particular.  Our choices on Wednesday afternoon were MIB III, seeing Avengers for the second time, or Snow White and the Huntsman.  I can only blame the fact that I'd only had 4 hours of sleep a night for the last 6 weeks on my decision to go with... Snow White. 

I thoroughly got what I deserved for my choice.  Christin Stewart wasn't awful, but she really only had about 4 lines in the entire film.  Most of the time she's in a scene the audience is treated to seeing her reactions to what's going on around her:  Ms. White reacts in terror to her cell mate's fate; Ms. White watching helplessly as others fight to defend her; Ms White setting her jaw as she leads her forces into battle.  Okay, she does have an 'inspiring' soliloquy where she rallies the troops (Christin Stewart is no Winston Churchill, and neither were the script writers) but for the most part she's scenery.  Charlize Theron doesn't help, going over the top with every syllable, and Chris Helmsworth just left my wife wishing he were 'more like Thor' in this film. 

It wasn't terrible.  Parts were entertaining and harkened back to classic faerie tales (including actual faeries - possibly the best part of the film).  But man, I started to cringe every time someone opened his or her mouths to deliver the next speech.  I blame the script.  No, I blame myself, for I chose to watch.  This is the sort of film I would highly recommend if it happens to be on cable and you are stuck at home giving a bottle to a newborn on a Saturday afternoon.  I am only mildly disappointed in myself for seeing this in the theater as it was a matinee and I paid half price. 

(Yes, apart from being caustic in my poorly expressed opinions I am also an unrepentant tightwad.)